Today is my first day back at exercising in over 3 years. Yes you read that right. For the past 3 years I have been on bed rest, modified bed rest, and just plain exhaustion. No one could tell me why I was so exhausted all the time. I would literally sit at my desk at work and cry because I was so tired. I ached, I felt cold, I wanted to die.
Then I got my answer as to why I felt this way. I had cancer. After fighting with Drs for close to 12 months the surgery I knew that needed to be done was finally done to shut me up. And after it was all said and done it turned out I was right, I had cancer, the original biopsy was wrong. But let me tell you within 3 days of having that darn stuff taken out of my body I started to feel human again. Now 6 months later I feel human enough to begin to recondition my body.
I have a series of 5 exercises I do 2-3 times a day. Simple core strengthening exercises that most people would laugh at. Well I did my first "set" tonight. I will admit it was humiliating. I used to do pilates and weight training like it was nothing. I could not even do 5 reps of each exercise tonight. But I did each of them as much as I was able and I am proud of myself. Hopefully by the end of the week I can start increasing my reps. The goal is by the end of the month to have enough core stability to do beginner pilates. Once that is done I will start to build up some cardiovascular endurance. I am not looking forward to that. I have to start at 2-3 minutes twice a day and very slowly build myself up as my heart is weak from everything it has gone through and the stress that was on it over the past few years.
If cancer has taught me nothing else it has taught me the need to feel alive. It was my wake up call and I am not taking it lightly.
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